BPD, Recovery, The Now - Healing

I am not my past, but I can become my future

I cannot change the past, nor control the future, but I can control the NOW.

I have a past, we all have a past but does the past define us? Only if we allow it to.

My wise-mind is kicking in now, taking control over emotion-mind and rational mind. This is key.

Wise-mind tells me I have been asking the wrong question. I have been asking “Who am I?” When I should be asking, “Who do I want to be?”

Because if I have this huge gap that is “identity”, instead of trying to fill it with fragments of a past me and super-glue them together, why don’t I just fill it with who I would like to be? Find a new me entirely? I think that is the right answer.

I read somewhere recently, “We become what we want to be by consistently being what we want to be each day.” I don’t remember where I read it, so I don’t know who came up with it. But it is a quote of significant import. (If anyone knows who said this, please let me know, as they deserve recognition for something so beautiful).

So what do I want to be? Who do I want to be? What am I passionate about? What would I like to be good at?

Not what I currently am, nor what I used to be, but what do I want to become.

Instead of waiting for others to write on the blank slate that is me, why not write upon myself? Recreate myself.

That is a whole lot more positive, isn’t it?

Instead of thinking I am not of value, why not BECOME of value?

Instead of thinking I am not lovable, why not BECOME lovable?

Instead of feeling empty, why not choose to fill myself with what I want to be filled with?

It is my choice. I do have a right to make that decision.

This is my body; this is my mind, this is my heart, this is my soul.

I should claim it and not be afraid to share it.

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