BPD, Identity, Mental health, Personal, The Past - Causes and Effects

Dear dominant male

Oh dominant male, I may admire your strength now may you admire mine.

I am not your property, I am not a thing. I am not a doll to dress as you please, nor a token, a decorative item to wear proudly on your sleeve.

You do not have the right to change me, to mould me, to destroy everything that is me to look better yourself.

You do not have the right to rule me.

You are not my superior; I am not your inferior.

Oh dominant male, we are partners in this life; we are a team; we are a couple; we are equal.

Our strength lies in unity; our yin and our yang. It must be balanced. Once cannot be more than the other.

Don’t tie me, don’t bind me, demand from me nor expect from me.

I am not your weaker part. I am not ‘her indoors’; I am not the washer of dishes, the cooker of meals. I am not your housekeeper, your cleaner, the nanny to raise your children.

I am the person whom you met; and adored and loved. So why change me into something new, and lesser than I was?

Respect me for my strength; love me for my heart and my power and the love that I give you. Give it back to me; don’t imprison me.

I am not an image; I am real. I live, I love, I feel and I am deserving of better.

I am deserving of so much more than you give.

I am not a prop; I am not something pretty to smile vacantly by your side, unable to utter opinions of my own but duty bound to preach your beliefs and yours alone.

I am not here for your own self-image.

I am here for mine.

Don’t crush the beautiful flower that is me. Don’t pluck and scatter the petals of my sweet and trusting nature.

Don’t correct me, berate me, mock me and put me down.

Don’t tell me my beliefs are wrong.

Don’t tell me to obey for you are my better; my master and I your slave.

For I am not. I am your equal in life. Your better in love, for if you do these things to me – you do not love me. You do not respect me for who I am.

Let me be me as much as I let you be you.

Let me be free as you wish to be free.

Let not your fear or jealous rage imprison me. For I will batter myself do death upon the bars of your gilded cage.

In me you can trust for I love and adore you. Don’t let those feelings turn to hate.

I am your friend, your lover, your trusted confidante; I will be loyal, please be loyal to me.

Love me, hold me, honour me, respect me. Stride proudly by my side and hold your head high knowing that I am special for I am me and I am worthy.

Do not dare be my spokesperson I can speak for myself.

Don’t forget the me that first attracted you.

Don’t forget the me you fell in love with.

Don’t try to improve me, mould me, change me to fit your own grand self-image.

Just remember me the me you fell for and hold on to that me.

For in me, for me, as me then I am free to choose.

If you let me be me then I will be yours.

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