This whole dating thing is not to find a life partner. Certainly not a husband – because I really like my own space and probably more so than most and although it’s great having visitors, it is also stressful having people stay under my roof. I appreciate the company, but it is not easy, so… Read More This Whole Dating Thing
I am a woman today, even though I usually am. Today is different because I am consciously trying to be a woman. Not all women, but something that I’m generally not. Today I am trying to be a feminine woman. Today I am a woman, deliberately and with thought. Today my tangled, dimpled, jolly fatness… Read More Today I am a woman
Again. I had entirely forgotten that I had previously joined the library. I must have done so when I first moved here. It is quite possible as I moved here thinking I would work part time for myself, become an active member of the local community, have time for my creative pursuits. I think I… Read More Today I joined the library
I give myself permission to smile, to cry, to take the time to heal. I give myself permission to be … I am far from perfect, but I don’t need to be. It should not be you, or you, or you who tells me who to be, what to wear, to eat, to drink, how… Read More I give myself permission …
I’m wearing pearls today. I went out. Out further than I usually go, but not physically. Physically the distance was average, just once again to the next town. But mentally further, because I didn’t go alone. Today I went to a garden party in the rain. This I am sure is the first garden party… Read More Today I’m wearing pearls
Absent from the world. Locked away. Surviving. A promise I will keep. A guarantee because I now know people care. I know it is important to others that I am here. I still do not understand why. That’s a block I can’t see past. I get up; I shower, I make myself move. I know… Read More Absent
Therapy. Therapy is what makes you better, right? BPD and C-PTSD and the need to ‘recover’ means I have to go through different types of therapy. I’m finding this problematic on three levels. Firstly, the whole concept of needing therapy to fix the person that I am or was or whatever because I am no… Read More Problems with therapy
How deep in the darkness do you dare go to lead someone you love back into the light? How do you lead someone out of the darkness when they don’t even know they are there? When blinded and programmed, living in a strange sheltered little world, withering and twisting away, dancing to the tune of… Read More How deep in the darkness do you dare go …
I took you from the ends of the earth, from its farthest corners I called you. I said, “You are my servant.” –Isaiah 41:9 ———————————————————————————————————————————- I personally don’t know whether Isaiah said that or not and I am not about to get up off my backside and pick up the book which may give me… Read More You are my servant!
How do you trust in fate? This is a big question. Believing in fate. I am at a point in my life where somehow, I need to do this. I need to take a leap of faith, not only is doing that a seemingly impossible task but which direction should I choose? It is a… Read More How do you trust in fate?